Ferrets and weasels and general noises in the roof
We are invaded by ferrets !! For several weeks we could hear thumping and galloping sounds on the roof. We put mouse poison up there, working on the assumption that mice were attracting elephants. A dreadful stench filled the house (on the packet it said NO PONG poison) but the elephants continued.
I don’t think they can be elephants, I decided, because a)an elephant would have difficulty getting up there and b) elephants don’t live in France.
So it was obviously a giraffe or cat.
Indeed at one stage we could hear tweet-tweet-tweet which was either me trying to use Twitter or a nest of birds. Then, a few days later we heard “miouw ….” Ah-ha! thought I. There was some really distressing tweeting and miouwing as murder was done but, we thought, that will be the end of that.
No such luck. The elephants came back. With giraffes.
So we decided The Time Had Come. You’ll have to climb up on to the roof I told the caretaker. No, he replied. Very succicnt, I thought. In fact it was non, but translated in to English that is no. So I phoned the pest control people who came round remarkably quickly (Ets. Marion).
Oh la la! they said. You hev ze ferrettes in yorre rrooof, they said. Ze eat zi wires for ze electricite. Iz no good.
I agreed it was no good and so they did a dastardly deed of some kind, involving (I think) more murder and – hopefully – this will make the elephants go away. I have a sketch of a ferret somewhere. I did it years ago for one of my children. I’ll try to find it for you. Au revoir for now.
Catherine Broughton is a novelist, a poet and an artist. She is widely travelled and writes regularly for magazines and blog sites. Her sketches are on her web site http://www.turquoisemoon.co.uk . Her books are available from Amazon and on Kindle, or can be ordered from several leading book stores.